Say Goodbye

How do you let it go? When you,
You just don’t know? What’s on,
The other side of the door
When you’re walking out, talk about it
Everything I tried to remember to say
Just went out my head
So I’ma do the best I can to get you to understand
’cause I know

There’s never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
‘Cause if I don’t you’re gonna start hating me
Cause I really don’t feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it’s not you, it’s me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)
There’s never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it’s hard but I gotta do it,
And it’s killing me
Cause there’s never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

~Chris Brown

Rainy Night

I’ve been driving down this road for a while now. The early days were the best. They were new. They were fun. They were fresh and we loved it. Those were the days. Then days turned to weeks, week to months and before we knew it a year had gone by. The road had a few bumps but we made it. Another year passes, this is a long road. Twists and turns and potholes got in the way but we made it through. Still, this is a long road. Tire change, tire rotation, oil change and inspection. Keep it moving. Car wash cleans the outside, who cares what’s inside. It’s just us driving it right? Gas it up and go.

I used to be afraid of leaving you. Months gone by and I’m still on this road, almost 3years now. And I notice—when my tears fall so does the rain. It’s difficult to drive at night, in the rain, with tears filling your eyes. And mine are full. Still driving, the road is getting rough but to my surprise I think I see the end. Was this my destination? I don’t think this is where I planned on going. But I’m here…almost.  In the midst of the rain it’s all so clear.

It was on a rainy night I realized this road has come to an end

Next Lifetime

Now what am I supposed to do
When I want you in my world
How can I want you for myself
When I’m already someone’s girl?

First time that I saw you boy
It was a warm and sunny day
All I know is I wanted you
I really hoped you looked my way
When you smiled at me
So warm and sweet
I could not stay
You make me feel like a little bitty girl
What do you do to me

Now what am I supposed to do
When I want you in my world
How can I want you for myself
When I’m already someone’s girl?

I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
No hard feelings
I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
I’m gonna be there

You’re imaging
Feels so damn good to me
It picks me up don’t wanna come down
You got me spinning all around
Yeah
You need to know
I’ve got that somebody
You’re beautiful
But it ain’t that type of party

Now what am I supposed to do
When I want you in my world
How can I want you for myself
When I’m already someone’s girl?

Well I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
Baby we’ll be butterflies
I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
That sounds so divine
I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
I guess I will now
I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
Wait
Wait a little while

See it ain’t nothing wrong with dreaming
Boy don’t get me wrong
Cause every time (every time) I see you (every single time)
I know just how strong (every single time)
That my love is for my baby
But emotions just don’t lie
Well I know I’m a lot of woman
But not enough to divide the pie

Now what am I supposed to do
When I want you in my world
How can I want you for myself
When I’m already someone’s girl?

I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
Already
I’m going to be there
I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
I’m going to look for you

Now what am I supposed to do
When I want you in my world
How can I want you for myself
When I’m already someone’s girl?

I guess I’ll see you next lifetime
Oh
Oh baby
I’m gonna be there
I’m gonna be there

~Erykah Badu

Mo’ Money = No Problems

As a college student I’m pretty much used to not having enough. I need money for tuition, money for books, money for supplies, I have a $300 parking pass that I buy every semester just to keep my car here, and that’s just the money that goes to my school! There’s still gas money, food money, and cell phone bill! Being a student is hard and getting grants and scholarships is even harder. Financial aid helps to a certain extent, but thanks to God and a close friend of mine my future just got a little bit brighter.

Last semester, although financial aid covered most of my tuition they still left me with $1,500 to pay to VCU. Well at this wonderful university, if a semester isn’t completely paid off by a certain time then students can’t register for classes the following semester. I was only able to give a little over $400. I remember being on the phone with my parents (who live in Japan by the way) and crying because I didn’t think I’d be able to register. Luckily my dad was able to pick up my slack but then he told me “Now you know for next semester, so you need to save up $1,500.” Say what!? That would be possible, if I were making $10/hour. But I’m not.

Now I’m gonna take you back to January when a good friend of mine, Mario, told me about a grant that the bank BB&T gives away every year for students within a 200mile radius of Martinsville, Virginia. It’s simple, just answer a few questions and first come first served. It’s so funny because I remember the day I called. The day the rat race began for the grant I was on my way the hospital. I had a fever and temperature of 103 and as I was parking my car in the parking lot of the hospital at 7:30 in the morning, Mario calls me. Just to get an application for this grant you have to be one of the first callers and it’s one day only, starting at 8am. And even though I was in pain I called, and after many many tries I got through. Now you make the call in January and they send you the application in February to be filled out and mailed back, and here it is July 1st. Yesterday when I got off work I checked my mail and what do ya know. A letter from BB&T congratulating me for getting the grant in the amount of $1,500. Was I excited you ask? Heck yeah I was excited! I cried and thanked God then cried some more. I was so happy and found it so ironic that I was awarded that much. When Mario told me about the grant his words were “It won’t be much, maybe $400-$500 but it’s still something,” so I went for it. And I thank God that I did.